My good mate Tim Garratt sent me a link to these, presumably as he had bought them for a close family member (geddit). For me, they look like the perfect Royal Wedding souvenir.

You can buy them here – A bargain at only £5 per pack. It’s worth going over the website, just for the copy, which is brilliant.
But I think my favourite part of the whole press pack is the two line disclaimer they throw in at the end.
Crown Jewels Condoms of Distinction are not endorsed, sanctioned or supplied to Prince William of Wales, Ms Catherine Middleton or any member of the Royal Family.
Crown Jewels Condoms of Distinction are a novelty product and may not be suitable as a contraceptive or barrier against sexually transmitted disease.
Mr Lyle, trust you to lower the tone on Valentine’s day. Hope you didn’t buy any with yor amazon voucher!
I haven’t spent my voucher yet from you and my beloved WB Sharks. But I will do and i’m sure i’ll be spending it on more books and other cool stuff.
Thanks
John
Premature, and should be withdrawn. Fnaar…